Thoughts on Mother's Day

Mother's Day wasn't a Hallmark-moment day for me. I worked the whole day and got home at 8:30pm. It is no big deal, I don't really want a big deal made out of mother's day. I guess, I don't really feel like a mom most days, eventhough I really am.

However, I had a few thoughts about being a mom today as my daughter and I enjoyed a lazy morning and later as I checked some emails.

Before kids, I always heard people saying how much kids change your life. The changes they create can't even begin to be imagined until you have one of your own. You may think you understand that phrase, but you don't, unless you have had a child.

The center of your world shifts. Your attitude shifts. Your worries and concerns change. The way you see yourself changes. Sometimes just watching your child do the simplest of things can just inspire awe in the fact that you are responsible for her being here and that starts a cycle of thought, thinking about how your mom must have felt looking at you and her mom felt about her, etc, etc. You begin to think about moms through the generations and if they didn't do what I am doing now, I wouldn't be here.

You watch your child discover new things, learn new words, apply concepts and it is fascinating to see their little brains grow and soak in everything. The simple truths that start to come out of their mouths, such as this morning when my daughter says, "Mom, you work too many days." Which was true because I had just finished working 4 straight 12 hour shifts and had seen her for all of about 4 hours in as many days. Or when at the coffe shop she comments that a particular woman has long hair and a big tummy, which was true (the woman was quite obese). Thank goodness, she hasn't learned the word "fat" yet and I hope she didn't over hear the 3 year old's observations.

And as I was discussing with another mom, when you have a child you starting seeing that you are making changes in your life to be a better person, striving to be a positive influence for them. I don't make a big deal about bad drivers with her in the car. I try to eat healthier and exercise more. I go to the library more and read to her more. You just want to be more and you want so much more for your child.