Like white uniforms are going to save your ass

Yeah, a smidge of profanity in that title, but nothing compared to what I was saying most of the day. Our facility is being audited by the Joint Commission on Accreditation (JCAHO). They come around and audit hospitals all the time to make sure they are up to snuff. As you can imagine, management does a great job of scaring the crap out of its employees about the audit. They don't really bother to get you more training or help so that you can actually pass the audit, just lots of scare tactics. "Oh, JCAHO is coming!" There were so many last minute communications that they started to conflict with each other. It was nuts. I decided, I would just make sure I knew our facilities policies and try to do my job as best as I could and hope for the best.

Well, our new manager seemed to think it would be great if we all wore the same color scrubs at work and if everyone would by new white shoes. That idea went over like a lead balloon. I think one brown noser on the unit bought new white shoes. However, the manager outwitted us. She bought everyone white scrubs and whoever showed up the day the audit happened, would have to go back and change.

There is no real warning on the audit and there was no warning on this required costume change. We just know that JCAHO is in the area and will probably be auditing us this month with a "surprise" inspection.

Lucky for me, it was yesterday. Announcement come on over the PA system, "We'd like to welcome the Joint Commission Auditors, etc...." The boss then comes out with the white scrubs and announces we all must change.

So many problems with this situation. Only one bathroom to change in and it is a 1 banger, meaning small with 1 toilet. The breakroom was then turned into an impromptu locker room as people franctically tried to change as I tried to eat my breakfast in there. People were wearing lots of interesting underwear which could easily be seen through these cheap, white thin scrubs. And, everyone could see my tattoo on my back ALL day. "Oh, is that a dragon!" That is how thin these scrubs were. "Oh, how cute. All in white? Are caps next?" My favorite comment from a doctor, "You guys are freaking me out. I thought I had walked into a psych ward."

But the thing that irked me the most was that our manager seemed to think that if we all did this it would somehow help us pass muster. It just seemed so staged and fake. No one wears whites anymore unless you are in nursing school. I bet if she had her way we'd be in those white caps also. I am also pretty sure, the auditors won't be distracted by a lot nurses in white scrubs.

Boy, did I curse a LOT that day under my breath. So glad I am off the next 6 days.